


Anchor

by Marialenaav



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Anxiety, Bucky Barnes Fluff, F/M, Fluff, Major Character Injury, selfdoubts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-20
Updated: 2018-12-20
Packaged: 2019-09-23 09:51:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17078069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marialenaav/pseuds/Marialenaav
Summary: After your teammates injury leaves you wondering what your place in the Avengers team is, Bucky is there to remind you.





	Anchor

**Author's Note:**

> Hello guys!This is my first piece of fan fiction. English is not my native language so please bare with me for any grammar mistakes. It’s a three part series and I will post every four days! Let me know what you think!

Your problems, traumas and worries were placed in boxes beautifully arranged in the back of your brain. They looked like a wall but not really a sturdy one. When someone would try to peek into one of them the rest would start trembling and if they decided to pull it out then they would all fall. All at once. Together. And with them you would follow. 

“Oh my God this is all my fault”, you muttered to yourself as you held onto an injured Peter. It was supposed to be an easy mission. In, erase the files and out. It was your first mission teaming up with Peter and both of you were ecstatic about it.   
You were fighting off a H.Y.D.R.A. agent and just when you were about to knock him out a second one snuck up on you ready to shoot you .You were so focused on fighting the agent in front of you that you didn’t hear the other one coming. The sound of a gunshot took you by surprise. You froze and just when the bullet was about to pierce through your body someone pushed you way.  
“Damn you Parker what have you done.” You carefully inspected the injury. “this is bad this is so bad, what the hell were you thinking you moron.” He was losing so much blood. You needed to get out of here immediately.  
“Tony, Peter is down. You need to get as out of here, he needs medical attention” you said through the intercom.  
“Define bad” said Tony, the anxiety clear in his voice.  
“He got shot trying to save me. There is no exit wound and the bullet is stuck in his abdominal area. Tony he is losing so much blood and I can’t do anything to stop it.” 

The team was on standby, carefully hidden in the thick forest waiting for you and Peter to come out of the H.Y.D.R.A. safe house any moment now. They were all pretty nervous as it was the first time they let the two of you alone in a mission but there was a certain super soldier that had become a literal bundle of nerves.  
Bucky had a sweet spot for you. You tried to see the best in each person, never judging them for their past. You were patient and always there to listen to everyone’s worries. They would confide in you and you would offer a kind word and a piece of advice. When one night you found him in an awful state while he was having a night terror you were quick to approach him. You talked to him with soothing words, tenderly caressing his cheek until you were able to wake him up. That was the moment he knew he’d never loved one like you. He had fallen deep, deeply in love with you and there was nothing he could do to stop himself from doing so.  
When he heard your trembling voice through the intercom he felt his heart shutter. Something was wrong. Peter was injured and badly from what he could understand but there was something more than that. 

When Tony and the rest of the Avengers emerged into the building Bucky was the first to approach to and you fell into his arms. He held you tightly,his head resting on top of yours. Violent sobs fell from your lips and you immediately regretted your decision to let Bucky see you like that. You let go of him and run to the quintet.The ride back to the Compound was extremely quiet. While Helen attended Peter's injuries you were looking at your shaking hands.They were covered in blood.Peter's blood. Your thoughts were eating you up alive. This was your fault. Peter, sweet, innocent Peter almost died because of you. Because of your recklessness. This wouldn't have happened if you had been more careful. Why do you always do that? How on earth do you manage to screw up every single time? You shouldn't have joined the Avengers, you knew something like this would happen. You destroy everything you touch why the hell would anything be different this time? You needed to leave,right now,before anyone else gets hurt because of you. 

The moment you reached the compound you ran towards your room and locked your door. You quickly discarded the bloody clothes to the floor and jumped in the shower. The hot water on your skin felt like a touch of silk to your aching body. You stood there for what felt like hours until you've gotten rid of all the dried blood. Enveloping yourself with a fluffy towel you searched through your drawers for one specific t-shirt. Bucky's T-shirt.You've stolen it over a week ago while he was away on a mission. You didn't want to admit it but his smell always brought you comfort. He made you feel safe,loved even though you didn't think you deserved either his love or his affection. He was the best person you've ever met. Strong,loyal and even after everything he's been through he was still so loving. How could you not fall for him? You put on the t-shirt and a pair of sweaters and laid in your bed seeking some comfort from your fluffy duvet. 

You needed to leave,pack your things and disappear off the face of earth. Even the thought of leaving them behind brought you to tears but deep down you knew it was for the best. What use could you ever be to them? They were heroes and you were just you. A broken girl with a shuttered soul and a crumbled mind. You would only slow them down, or even worse, get them killed. Look at what happened to Peter. If anyone else got hurt because of you,especially Bucky, you wouldn't be able to forgive yourself. 

You were quick to your feet,tears streaming down your face,emptying drawers into a duffle bag, unbeknownst to the fact that a certain super soldier who had heard all the fuss had come to check on you. Bucky reached for the doorknob to enter your room but found your door locked.   
"Y/n what's going on doll? Is everything okay?  
"I'm fine Buck,go back to sleep." You stifled a sob and tried to make your voice sound as though you hadn't been crying for over an hour.  
"You don't sound fine. Have you been crying? Y/n please let me in" he begged, a pained looked painted in his face. "Open the door Y/n,please. Unlock the door or I'll just break it."  
With a defeated look on your face you unlocked the door and Bucky entered the room. He scanned his surrounding and saw the mess that was your room. "Wow doll it looks like a bomb went off in here. What happen-".He stopped mid sentence, the duffle bag full of your clothes drawing his attention. "No" he said firmly.   
"Whatever it is that you think you're doing don't do it" he murmured and quickly approached you.   
Taking a step back, a step away from him you answered as calm as you could "I have to James,it's for the best. Look what happened to Peter because of me, because I wasn't careful enough. I only bring trouble and pain. The team will be better off without me. Everyone will be better off without me."   
With a step he closed the distance between you two and held you close. "You're not going anywhere,do you hear me? You're not leaving. We need you here even though you think otherwise."   
"Bucky let me go"  
"No"  
"Bucky let go off me. I'm leaving. I really am. It's for the best."  
"I said no." He almost yelled,holding you even closer than before and cupping the back of your head with his hands. "Don't you get it? You can't leave me. I need you here. I need your corny jokes when I'm gloomy. I need to hear your laugh and see you smile because you brighten my days.I need your tender touch to calm me down after a nightmare. I need you Y/n because you make me want to be a better person. Because you make everything that has happened to me easier to deal with just by being you. By being that goofy and at the same time the most serious person I've ever met, the most loving,forgiving and caring creature I've ever had the pleasure to encounter. And most of all I need you here because I love you."his voice fainted while saying the last part, he himself not being able to believe he'd finally gathered the courage to admit it both to you and himself.   
You stood frozen,trying to comprehend what had just happened. Bucky, James Buchanan Barnes, just told you he loved you. You. And you could swear you've never felt happier in your lifetime.   
"Bucky I-"  
"Y/n you don't have to say anything. I'm sorry I shouldn't have said that. You certainly don't feel the same wa-" he started rumbling,clearly anxious from your reaction.  
That was your turn to interrupt him though.With a swift move you brought your hands to his cheeks and before he had time to register what was happening your lips were on his.


End file.
